Note: This article is part two of a series. If you have not read “Laying the Ground Work to Become a Father (Part 1)” you may want to read it first.
2. Occupy your time with positive activities
A. Physical activities are great for getting in shape and producing endorphins that encourage brain growth.
You definitely want to continue after your child is born also. You can do individual activities, but family activities are more unifying. Family activities can include things like Karate, hiking, swimming, dancing or anything else that makes you sweat. This is also good for your partner who will be carrying the baby. Remember, you are not doing this to prove you are tougher than your wife. Try that and she might have you doing Yoga or something else for which the female body is better designed.
B. Brain activities such as research, reading, Sudoku, and writing will help keep you mentally alert.
You may have heard the saying “If you don’t use it, you’ll lose it!” There is a whole lot of truth to that saying. It doesn’t just deal with your studliness. That word is not found in any dictionary, but if you looked it up, you would be doing a good brain exercise. You don’t have to read romance novels or fairytales to keep your noodle cooking. You could read “How to” books found at any hardware store, how to soup up your 69’ Mustang, or home gardening tips. It doesn’t matter, as long as you read things that are good for you. Kids in the early years believe that their father is the smartest man in the world. Don’t disappoint them by proving them wrong in the first few years. Opening a centerfold is NOT a healthy brain activity, nor is reading comic books.
C. Cooking, camping, art, playing music, and motor cross riding are all great activities.
Kids love being with their father while working in your yard, fixing the car, and doing repairs on the house all help.Don’t wait for the kids to come to try these because you would like to have some knowledge of what you are doing beforehand. The combinations of physical and mental activities have doubly good rewards. If you include your spouse and later on your children in these endeavors, wow! There are many good resources to search and find healthy activities such as gethealthyu.com/45-fun-and-healthy-activities-to-do-with-your-kids-this-summer/ and www.parents.com › Fun › Sports › Exercise › 10 Ways to Exercise as a Family.
D. Do activities with friends that are like you. People with the same likes and dislikes that you possess.
Good friends will also keep you accountable for your actions. Pick friends that bring the best out of you, not the worst. If you have friends that could get you thrown in jail, walk away. When you are single, hang around single friends. As a couple, hang around couples. Consequently, when you are married, hang around married couples.
These changes of friend groups seems like a strange recommendation, but it is a reality that provides security for a future father and a future mother. I don’t mean physical threat security, but relational security. In most cases, there is no threat, but it only takes one time where you enter a cold spell and along comes this friend who doesn’t have the responsibility, is on his worst behavior, and is a smooth talker. He may be better looking than you, smarter than you, and as smooth as silk. They won’t set out to do anything, but if they are alone and the hormones kick in, beware. This brings me to the next point.
E. Jealousy is not a result of love, but mistrust! It is not about not trusting the other person.
It is about not trusting each other. Why did you connect with your partner in the first place? It was because you saw something that attracted you? Of course! Do both you and your partner become less attractive now that you are together? No! You are still going to attract certain people. What you do is what is important when someone flirts with you. This subject will be covered in greater detail in the future.
F. Attend church.
This sets in motion the attitude of accountability to God for your actions. Accountability, responsibility, and faith found in the teaching of the church will give you support and help as a father and husband.
G. Do positive activities, not negative time robbers.
Things that are not positive include but are not limited to: excessive drinking, long hours of video games, and social media (this site excluded) when it takes over long blocks of time and discourages interaction with people face-to-face. Nothing says “I love you” like being mentally somewhere else. Children will vie for your time and affection. If they don’t get it from positive ways, then they will get it from negative actions. “Daddy only loves me enough to pay attention to me when I make him mad!”
Wrapping it Up!
This is a basic outline of what you can do to prepare your life for bringing children in the world. If you wait to try to make the changes when your child arrives, then your life will be very difficult. You will have too many changes when you add a little child in the mix. Look for new articles that cover the specific areas of your interest in future blogs.